Day 20/Post 18: Facing the World Together

 

love

Yesterday was Robbie’s birthday. I had planned to dedicate my post to him and tell you all of the wonderful and fabulous things about him. But, life happens. Instead I ended up falling behind in posts AGAIN due to a power outage.

At about 5:00 AM we were awoken by a very LOUD crack of lightning. It shook our house. Not thunder. Lightning. We still aren’t sure if it actually hit the house or if the damage we sustained resulted form the power failure immediately following. At any rate when the power came back on I realized that the satellite wasn’t working, the internet and phone weren’t working, since the microcell we depend on for cell service runs on wi-fi we had no cell service, our TV that is just over a year old (just out of warranty) wouldn’t turn on, and the fridge wasn’t cooling properly even though it was running CONSTANTLY. :-/

At first I hesitated to tell Robbie. It was his birthday after all and I was really hoping to have it all figured out and fixed by the time he got home so he wouldn’t have to deal with it. But then he called to see if the power was back on (I was at my mom’s at this point, mooching a few precious minutes of internet, so I had cell service). I couldn’t just NOT tell him while we were on the phone so it all came pouring out. He didn’t say much, just asked a few questions and made a few suggestions.

By the time he got home nothing was really fixed. I’d made phone calls but was waiting for call backs or service people. In my mind I was tallying up the costs of fixing or replacing all of this stuff and was close to tears. He came in, calm but also clearly frustrated by the situation. But I tried to remember the lesson I learned just a few days ago about not taking on his frustrations. Instead I listened and then I told him what I was really worried about. Neither of us offered any half-hearted reassurances we just let the other share their concerns and then we each took a breath and some space.

Somehow just talking to him made me feel better though and I think it did for him as well. He came in from the garage a bit later, pulled me into his arms and said, “We have so much to be thankful for. I stood in the garage and looked around at our old but running and paid for vehicles, looked back at our home that kept us safe, warm and dry during that storm and mostly thought about the happy, healthy people inside it. I realized that buying a new fridge and TV would not be the end of the world.”

In that moment every ounce of stress and worry I’d been feeling melted. I realized that we’d been in far more difficult predicaments in the past 18 years and we’d survived, together. This was nothing. A lot of little things that happened to bombard me on the same day. This day is no match for us as a team.

The feeling immediately brought to mind the above quote. I do admit that occasionally we do gaze at each other and I think that has an important place in a relationship. But I also realized that in of my favorite picture ofย  us we are looking ahead, together. Yesterday, on his birthday, Robbie gave me a great gift by reminding me of this simple truth.

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6 responses to “Day 20/Post 18: Facing the World Together

  1. I don’t know about conquering but it certainly makes things more bearable.

    And no, not quite as bad as it seemed. We’re still waiting to see if a few things can be fixed and how much it will cost but a few others were relatively cheap and painless.

  2. I don’t know if you know that I gave that quote to Mark on a photo frame when I was 16 ๐Ÿ™‚ It still sits by our bed and I’m completely positive that it is the “secret” to our relationship success. I tend to write it in wedding guest books or cards to newly married people too.

    • I knew it was special to you somehow, it was one of those things when we first met that I realized we had in common. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. My hubby & I keep this thought in mind when things are tough, not the exact words, but keeping in mind our similar goals and feeling of team spirit going forward. I’m glad you have each other and are succesfully navigating this challenging day together, with love. I was wondering if your homeowner’s insurance doesn’t cover lightening damage to your possessions? I hope so. And I hope all the damage gets resolved soon.

    • Thanks, Michelle. Team spirit in a marriage is a wonderful feeling. ๐Ÿ™‚

      Our deductible is higher than the combined damage, it’s difficult to determine or prove a lightning strike which is treated differently than a power surge/failure by insurance companies, and I’ve heard too many stories in the last few days about skyrocketing premiums or outright cancellation after a small claim. So, we’re trying to get repairs instead of replacing things and hopefully keep costs to a minimum without involving our insurance. ๐Ÿ™‚

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