Hello again! As the year winds down I find myself, as usual, wishing I had written more this year. And that I’d exercised more. And made healthier food choices. And done more to fix up the house. And, and, and…
I know it’s fashionable to say we don’t need a new year to make changes and that’s true. But there’s also a part of me that gets drawn into the constant message that new year = new beginning. It feels more artificial to resist the pull than it does to allow the calendar to dictate these things. And it’s not as if this is the only time of year I attempt these types of changes.
Now feels like a good time to tell you that I just finished reading the latest installment of Bridget Jones and I realized that, much like Bridget, I like to make grand sweeping declarations to myself about how I’m going to Change My Life. And then my actual life happens and I drink, swear and/or eat instead.
So, if sweeping declarations and resolutions don’t work, does that mean I just give up? I guess that would be okay and I’ve made that choice before when I needed to learn that I’m already awesome and don’t need to change to be acceptable or good enough. But I also believe that humans are happier (at least this human) when they are experiencing growth and change (and in hindsight my goal that year wasn’t to have no goals, it was to learn to love myself just as I am.) So, when a friend recently shared this article on Facebook it resonated with me. I like the idea of developing a systematic approach to lifestyle changes instead of resolutions or goals. I especially like the idea of simply developing new, healthy habits as opposed to coming up with a list of ways I need to change. Because, as I said before, I’m pretty awesome and I don’t think it’s beneficial to convince myself that my current self isn’t good enough. The idea put forth by the author of the article allows me to work toward positive growth while still respecting my current self. Fantastic.
I typed and deleted some of my systems /goals here because I’m doing myself a favor by not sharing everything I want to put in place this year. I’ve learned that public accountability is actually more harmful than helpful for me. It’s my inner rebel, I suppose, but when I feel like people are watching me, judging me, assessing if I’ve really kept up with my promises (even those to only myself) that I falter. Last year I had this brilliant system for sticking to my diabetic diet needs and it was working really well for a while. But when I realized that my family was noticing (though not necessarily judging) my progress as I ticked it off on the fridge caledar I felt backed into a corner and the entire system fell apart. So, this year I’m not talking about my goals, I’m just doing it. I will tell you that all of my goals are about establishing good habits, not getting rid of old ones. And they are about finding strength and peace from within, not about changing myself or my life. Because did I mention that I’m already pretty awesome. 😉I’m